dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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