I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
