My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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