Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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