I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
