after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
