so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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