And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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