I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize