Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
