Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
