Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
