I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
