I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
