My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'm like, not good at living.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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