my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize