Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
