I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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