Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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