Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Randomize
