Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
