I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
