Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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