Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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