Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
