Porn is love you can see.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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