the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Randomize
