Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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