What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
