This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
