I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Randomize
