sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
