ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize