My first STD was from a foam party
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Randomize
