Non-Jews are for practice
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
