He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
