I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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