people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
