Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
