Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
