that's an acceptable place to lick
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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