Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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