we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
