He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
