Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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