Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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