Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
