ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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