I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize