Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
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