apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
