Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
